Under the Gigantic Sycamore Tree Spring 1968

Under the Gigantic Sycamore Tree Spring 1968

Spring of 1968 – the ending of my LACGH intern year
One night I sat under the giant sycamore tree perplexed
Wondering what I would do next.
Arguing with myself—not out of fear

But knowing the looming draft was near
And knowing that I would have to make a choice
Things in my mind were becoming crystal clear
I had to make a stand and give my feelings voice.

At about this time I now know MLK was shot,
But I was barely conscious of his lot
Medicine for me was far from easy
Suffering from a faulty memory

Struggling with memorizing minutiae
And the resultant shame of probation
For I learned if you maintain your silence
Others interpret this as genius.

With self confidence shaken I labored on resolute
But feeling nevertheless I had something to contribute
And with every day driving home to me the lesson
That saving lives was my life’s mission

And listening to Docs who had been in Vietnam and known
Of Vietnamese peasants out of Helicopters thrown
Two sent up, one pushed out without a thought
To terrify the other to talk.

I was not a joiner and decision was made in solitude
Under the whispering sycamore by the light of the moon
Knowing that my Med School dean with his connections
Could get me a Public Health Service commission.

But this was not an option as I say to you,
This was something I just could not do
But having made up my mind this was my only course
For as a physician helping the military kill was just not an option.

For everything about medicine is antithetical to war
The entire focus is on saving lives
And I breathed life into many
And brought them back from the dead

And under the sycamore I had the epiphany
And that accepting this was my destiny
For as long as accepted the consequences of my actions
No one could coerce me to violate my convictions.

At about this time Dr. King delivered the famous Beyond Vietnam Speech
A masterful and wise oration urging conscientious objection
I had reached in my solitary and independent way the same conclusion.
Putting me away from anyone’s reach.
This was a decision I made without counsel
And I know my family could never see
The horrific things that could happen to me
But with this this I did

And I was classified CO and then it was revoked
And the morning I was scheduled to feloniously refuse induction
As I opened the door to find a postman with a letter to view
Staying my induction pending presidential review

Ironically, this was just about the time of April 4, 1968 MLK assassination
And my file suffered some perturbation for I continued on not knowing
Whether the next day would be the day to refuse induction.
I learned to live under the threat of uncertainty

All the while doing basic cancer research
A fitting alternate service in my opinion
Until after 6 years they sent me correspondence
And after completing was finally again granted CO status

But 49 years later and now knowing about King
And looking back I am sure he would have approved
Of the course I took – I certainly have no regrets
As I know this was my only conceivable move.

Howard P. Charman, MD 4-6-2017


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